I know there are plenty out there that are militant against what i am about to write, but here goes…

Years ago during a road trip, my kids’ attitudes were terrible; they were fighting and bickering as kids sometimes do; but it went too far.  So I pulled off the highway and found a roadside park where I lined all five of them up along a fence and proceeded to tell them that if they died right then – with their current attitudes – I had reason to believe they all would go to hell. Wow, what a transformation! (This is not an exposition of my theology by the way… Now I would probably have been even tougher on them! That was a joke BTW))

Self-awareness. How do we get our kids’ minds around the Imago Dei?  -that they as rational creatures, most accurately reflect the glory of God. That their whole lives are a “set up” by God through his infinite love and mercy. However, in their goodness is badness. How do you help them understand the implications of the fall?

I was wondering if some of us parents, through our lack of precept (or example!) inadvertently teach our kids that living in a Christian family is like a Get out of jail free card?

But God has given us a precious gift. I have come to believe that the rod of discipline is a means of grace. In some mysterious way it provides the grace to my child to ultimately embrace a savior, Jesus Chris. It is the only way I can make sense of the following verse.

Proverbs 23:13-14 Do not withhold discipline from a child; if you strike him with a rod, he will not die. If you strike him with the rod, you will save his soul from Sheol.

It includes an imperative: do not withhold discipline from a child

It gives us a method: Strike with a rod

It addresses our fears: even though you strike him with a rod, he will not die. This is probably one of the greatest reasons parents don’t correct their kids through chastisement.

It gives us an incredible promise: you will save his soul from Sheol (hell).

Think about it. This is lunacy to the educated mind and to the modern/post-modern person. A stick and a whack on the rump will produce everlasting fruit?! But isn’t that just like God? He always requires faith…. So take a hint from God here.

Do we understand how grace comes to us in baptism or celebrating the Lord’s table?  It is mysterious and we don’t really know how it works, but we do know it does; so we embrace Scripture’s imperative and thereby receive the promise of his grace.

Even though, let’s try and figure it out though.  Here is how I have seen it: The rod of correction brings two benefits to our kids.

One… it imparts to them a healthy understanding of what sin is and that they are sinners. (this is good)

Two… after discipline, the humbling of their hearts to their parent’s authority through repentance in the end prepares their heart to submit to the ultimate authority: God. (this is better)

So when they turn about 12 to 14 years old – at least with my kids -  they accept the fact that God is God. So it becomes a simple and natural response to receive Christ as His Son and sacrifice for their sin.

Now, discipline without affection can be a very dangerous instrument in the hands of a parent.  And discipline without clear prior-admonition or post-resolution (i.e. clear and clean repentance) is equally dangerous.

I know this is rather simplistic, but I hope you find it helpful. To my married kids: don’t give up with your own kids.  Make sure they come to the cleansing repentance that only comes after clear chastisement.  And remember every attitude of anger, jealousy, forgiveness, selfishness, resentment are all manifestations of the self-absorption of the fall and need correction as much or more than their actions.

There, I’ve said enough to be dangerous!